My story with PB... concluded.

The story started here:

http://diaryofamadsoulsista.blogspot.com/2006/12/my-closure-bye-pb.html

So, it'd been over 3 years since we spoke but in January, we resumed our friendship or whatever is left of it anyway.

I wont get into the details, but from this experience, I have learnt that


1. where there is smoke, there is fire
2. Ountogaju, aawaa dero (whatever goes up, must come down)
3. There are no secrets in this world, neither are there mysteries. Just stories, waiting to be told.
4. A friend is only a friend for as long as she is friendly. Take it as that. Leave it, if that ship refuses to sail on good intentions.
5. Keep your enemies close, and your friends even closer.
6. Even friends, have flaws and that is okay. We are all humans. BUT Know what your friends flaws are!!! ..., before you get disappointed.
7. Assess both ends of an argument and never conclude, till you've heard each parties' stories.
8. Forgive! Forgive!! Forgive!!! (Really, it is not up to you to forgive. You simply must forgive, to survive the whole ordeal)
9. Let go, and let God.
10. It is well.

Subjective reasoning for life!

I must say, i have been through quite a lot.
i mean; a lot!
but then i'm sure so has everyone.
we tread through sticky muds
lots of quicksands,over hills and have multiple stumbles to reach greener pastures.
but as we stumble, we find that hills arent hills, but merely stepping stones...





One flew over the cookoo's nest and apparently,
right over yours too.
somehow, you managed yet again to miss the breadcrumbs
and i dont have the luxury of time, patience, nor energy
to translate anything to you.

i'd say you're slow.
but this ain about intelligence.
this is about you, being you.
i mean,
it must have been real hard even for you, to manipulate twisted meanings out such simple lyrics.
somehow, you managed to exert that out of this???
you needed some wind under your wings did ya?
no qualms... i understand your need.
desperate for actuals, you some-funky-how, squeezed hopefuls out of breeze.
desperation is a bitch.

but honestly, i am glad.
if this is what'll evoke thoughts that'll motivate change,
let it be that...
because i know how much that is needed.

every movie needs a hero
but ain no hero without a villain
its your story,
you may be the hero.
again, i understand.

almost like a necessity,
you need a stepping stone.
sure! let ma words be it.
pluck littile memory leaves to remind you of just how deeply you were touched.

if it'll influence positive changes,
see what you see, as you see it
because i doubt i care what you think of me
you may however
marinate your mind in your ignorance
assimilate every ounce of it
reflect till you're motivated!
if it helps, hey!
again, i understand
that life ain worth none,without objective forces
and overcoming those, is what we live for.
you need a reason to go on.

i know ignorance is bliss...
but it gives faux visions.
just all illusions.
when will you ever be true to yourself?

if you cant see it now,
Denial, will you ever?

you once motivated me.
i'm glad to return the favor.
you're welcome.
sure, you may thank me later.


(OH MA GOD! i think this is my first "praya for a heiffer post" that i wouldnt swear in! i'm soooooo gettin better! yayyyyy)

My closure with a heiffer called "Denial"

Praya for the heiffer tuesday came a day early this week, enjoy:

Denial,
You must be allergic to the truth
Because even she couldnt get you to see it
and even if you saw it
you found it necessary
that you must open ur mouth
or is it ur hands?
or maybe even ur thighs...
and spill whatever garbage you seemed fit enough to
make me sound or look wrong in hopes that that
will make you look right
or is it,..
feel better
Do you feel better now?

but just like a feeling is a feeling is a feeling,
what is wrong is also, what is wrong is wrong is wrong

and boy oh boy,
were you ever wrong!
and as blind as a stray dog,
neither could you find your way to the right path

i know you're allergic to the truth
but i hope this here, "truth" is hypoallergenic enough for you

get you some epinephrine babygurl
because you about to get a full dose of the allegen...

you were wrong and even your shadow would tell you it
wrong enough that you felt the need to act wronged,
play the victim, hopin ur audience would eat that shit up,gulp dat potion, get all empathetic, believe your acts, and maybe,... get u sum brownie points for havin been thru it
Wrong enough that you felt it necessary to divert attention from the point of the issues... plain and simply that you were wrong
Wrong enough that you decided to take a stance in a spot where you really didnt belong. (now for the record, your point of view dont matter, but i guess i thought you were true enough to be at least honest... i realise now, than you cant expect honesty from an imposter. so i must ask myself what i really was thinkin).
Would you dare share with the audience what the truth is? Tell them what the story is? Can you bear their responses?
i'd dare you to share but then, whats a dare to a pussy but a total waste of time?
cuz i sho as hell ain lookin forward to watchin a pussy ejaculate pure lies!

You ignorant coward
how could you?
i guess thats "how" you "could"
must'a been easy for you since a coward ain got no spine.
You're one'a dem spineless excuses for humanbeings i've heard so much about!
You ridiculous waste of motherfuckin matter,
you ought to be ashamed of yourself!

you were wrong
and oh how i regret
that my liver just wasnt good enough to make ma right arm do it
smack u right across yo face till i felt we were even
that ma voice failed me
told you the honest truth about you till it made you bleed
that i wasnt assertive enough to tell you to...
Get the fuk out and simply, go screw yourself
for takin for granted
what i'd hardly give
you ungrateful insensitive selfish bitch!


because truly, who can fukin judge me?
you?
or maybe...
your incredibly superficial posse?
lmao!


If i had continued to smile
pretended that i was not bothered
acted like a true airhead like the resta dem and sucked all ur shit up,
you would have been happier.
BUT I AIN ur shadow
I SPEAK TRUTHS regardless!
if you'd like to commit suicide over it,
(then may i suggest using a gun and shooting ur leg first?
i hear its quite easier to die from massive blood loss :)
kill urself all u want, Denial
because this fountain will never stop spillin
what it knows to be true
and that simply is that; you were wrong
and you still are wrong
so surround urself with all the lies you can
cushion urself up in those imaginary clouds
and sip on that fake colada
for as long as you fail to see the truth
all you do and see will be just that;
fake as fuk

Your "friendship" is easy to maintain
all i'd have to do is just
be like the rest of them and simply,
shut the fuk up and pretended it was "kool"
but i am sorry because unlike the rest of them,
i ain no zombie.


So let this be the closure, Denial
this here, is my last letter to you after which,
you are forgiven
only because i know forgiveness is the only way to freedom
from boundages of regrets and wrongs
because i'd like to move on, Denial... So...!
fake up whatever u wanna shit up
shit up whatever you wanna fake up
nauseate urself till you get emetic all you want!
and spit with that your tattle taling tongue,
whatever fecal matter you damn well please
because ...
i have concluded the story of you
your chapter is now closed and...
the truth remains yet still, that...

YOU

WERE

WRONG

(period!)


In less than but a lil while of knowing you,
i learnt a whole lot of lessons
and hope that i can put them
into use later
for these lessons, i MUST say
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and fuk u to everlasting
with ma hard gijangic humongous imaginary dick ;)